‘Twas a small but enthusiastic group of half-minds that I found gathered in
the parking lot of Milcroft Park. The temperature was finally warm enough to
wear shorts. However, there are some gams best left fully covered and that was
proven out by the glowing light emanating from the circle.
. Wait a minute...those are MY legs. Yes even with the approaching dusk, the
shine of my white legs kept the trail illuminated well into the night.
After a very brief chalk talk (which included the bad news that there was no
beer stop...again.).... We were led through Milcroft’s newest additions.
Endless partially built subdivisions filled our nostrils with that new house
smell...sawdust, paint and god only knows what other toxins.
As we rounded one corner Bum Steer said with a child’s delight that he
could smell Kool-Aid. We raised our faces to the source only to have our fantasy
dashed by the sight of Weaklink emerging from one of the many port-o-lets in the
area yelling...WHEW...DO NOT GO IN THERE. Kool-Aid will never seem the same
again. Luckily for Weaklink we didn’t know he was in there when we ran by. I
hadn’t participated in a good outhouse tipping in a long time.
Due to the hare’s inferior trail laying ability, half of us inadvertently
short cutted our way back to the chariots, which would not have been such a bad
thing except none of us had keys to the hash beer. Yours truly deeply regretted
the fact that I drank both my travelers before the run.
While we were all complaining and speculating where the true trail was since
we had followed marks all the way in to the parking lot, Black Widow decided
that he wasn’t going to wear the runners he had on anymore and he threw them
away. Two Jugs, not about to let a perfectly good pair of shoes go to waste
fetched them from the trash and forced them on his feet. He then informed us
that because of his ability to adapt to any size, the people he used to work
with called him Multifit Johnson .We didn’t ask him where he used to work or
whether or not that name only referred to his shoe size.
Eventually the other half of the pack returned from whatever imaginary trail
they were on and we finally had access to the beer. Co-incidentally my notes are
a little sketchy from here.
Down downs went as follows.
To the hare (Barbie) for his multi pronged trail.
Golden Shower got one for not being able to control his enthusiasm for other
female joggers he encountered on trail. He also got one for disgracing a Tim
Horton’s condom...or maybe it was trying to roll up the rim on a tim bit or
rolling up something itty bitty while peeing on trail. (I told you my notes were
sketchy) Anyway he got a down down.
Black Widow took one for all the short cutters. For some reason Skewbic
called him Black Window which of course resulted in an endless barrage of
pathetic puns about what a "pane ‘ he was etc. The GM should have
received a down down just for that but having learned my lesson from the Speedo
incident I held my tongue.
Beatle received a down down for backsliding and having multi coloured hair.
Clot got one for complaining too much and for walking too fast.
Roadkill got one for being an FRB
Yours truly and Dyscount got one for no apparent reason.
Weaklink was accused of peeing on trail,
Black Widow was also accused of that but it bounced back to Golden Shower
Two Jugs received the prick-of-the-week for his attitude, he said he ran true
trail but Skewbic said he came prematurely.
We did the usual chicken wing /beer pig out at the Sly Fox and discussed the
fact that we all thought that Oral Sox’s nose job looked totally natural.
On on
