Roadkill's Rotten Run

This being the usual Roadkill event, we shoulda known better to even start and just gone on with the foot impaired Canoodle right to the Menu and start drinking, but no, we were ambitious and we wanted to run, the whole damn rotten run and a rotten run it was. We start off in an innocent enough little parking lot, and here I find out that Humidor is in the happy way, so she shoulda gone with Canoodle, but as it is she toddles along with Hyena, but at least is not foolish enough to go down onto the golf course like some intrepid eejits did right from the start. From here it only gets worse, since, to put it simply, everyone gots lost and at the end there were people coming in from at least 6 different routes. Although we enjoy the loverly scenery, the view of the river and its high rust-hued banks, there can be too much of a good thing since this route was everlasting, giving us the opportunity for many philosophical discussions. And here is Barbie discussing the colour of my undergarments. "I'd say, I'd say they is pink Hanes HerWays!". Well I certainly did not get it my way, because no solace on the way and passing a long ago two-jugged beerstop at which hot rum toddies for the thirsty were proffered, and being in that state of extreme thirstiness now, we were told that Roadkill does not believe in beerstops, since "it takes up useful time" and "people don't want to run after that", hell no, certainly not the remaining 10 miles on the schedule..... So then there is a choice, which really is not a choice, because of some very ugly terrain up ona hill, and apparently even worse going down on the other side of the mountain, but some yankers went that way anyway, and from here on in we all took different trails. So I hear the worst cemetery jokes in passing, "people are dying to get in there", "how many dead people are in there? All of them!" What useless, Useless Jokes! Yours truly remembers her group getting smaller and smaller, the dregs ending up going down some bloody hill, and slogging through some very slimy river, to the dismay of fishermen whose prey disturbed, and up a very steep staircase having green stuff trailing on my shoelaces, and at the end of this bloody effort I am running all by meself, and have only me and me to thank for making it back to the parking lot.

So the on on is at Roadkill's where we find out from the Menu that he took the whole bloody day to set a run which he labeled "inoffensive" and "moderate". The howls of dismay at the down-down ceremony testified to the poor participants' discontent, so a down-down to the hare for a very terrible run that had toooo many beerstops.

Another DD to Black Widow for going more up and down than a whore's knickers.

DD to Canoodler and Menu for bashing without hashing - hey Menu lives here!

DD to Wet Pussy who went blatantly down a false trail even when told to come back, and was sucking on a wet peach

TwoJugs accuses Oral Sox of scaring the hell out of him earlier in the day, having been stung by a bee, but once they got to emergency and seeing the line up, she was O.K. - I guess she does this trick every time she has a little prick in her. And the Headmattress gets turned on by the plunger, I=ve never seen her so frisky except when eating my Dutch applepie of which she confesses she has visions, and there=s endless hotdogs flipped by the Hyena and more wine and more wine and great desserts but not my pie, and when all is drunk and et, we jump in the chariot and head home. Head, who said head?......shut up Phart! Not after this exhaustive effort!

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Reported by ET